Father

My most import job that I have right now is being that best father that I can be. I was reminded of that this weekend. All other things come second.

I want my kids healthy and happy.

WOW!

Its been a long and crazy week. I feel under attack. Pray for me.

Lord, be my strength and my shield! I can do all things through you! AMEN!

Pole

We met at the pole this morning. Just a few in numbers but strong in faith.

We met at the pole to pray for our nation, our town and our school.

We met at the pole and locked hands and prayed.

I prayed... I need YOUR voice in my heart.

WE need YOUR voice in our halls.

We need your LOVE in our LIVES.

We met at the pole... what happens next?

Humpty

I used to think my heart was like Humpty Dumpty. It was broken and nothing could piece it back together again.

Now I am beginning to see that it is broken... True! But it can be like a mosaic. Broken, sure, but given to the right Artist it can be worked back together into something better than it ever was.

I am writing a new song...

Beautifully Broken, Wonderfully Saved

Homecoming

I just found out that there won't be church on Thursday night because of my school's Homecoming coronation. WOW!! What a letdown. I am really burning for church and fellowship and Word and worship and praise. I don't want to skip a week for a popularity contest...

Let me tell you something... the only KING is Jesus Christ. and the only Homecoming that matters is His!!

Not the Point

I had a strange experience the other day. An old friend sent me a rather nasty message through a social network. He was concerned that I wasn't living a virtuous life and that I had fallen away from my faith. It was quite judgmental and condescending.

His heart, I believe, was in the right place. And believe me, I have been running from the Lord a lot lately. I have turned off my creative juices and tucked up into a ball like an armadillo to protect myself from old wounds. And that hasn't worked for me at all. I just find myself cold, lonely and separated from that warming Spirit that gives me a greater purpose than getting up to turn off the alarm clock every morning. But this person 's message did not pull me through. It just made me mad.

It's funny. If you are truly concerned about a brother or sister, what you should do is reach out to them. Ask them, "Hey man... how ya doing?" or "Is everything cool with you?"

It's a very Christ-like thing to reach out to someone who is struggling. And He reached out and offered hope. He gave the light. He offered healing, love and redemption. That is best done with an open hand and kind heart.

I am working at this relationship with Christ. I am laying down some old pain and getting back into the world as a missionary for Him right where I am. I will have my ups and downs. I will fail at times but I am back and I am following Him.

I look around my life and I see many people that seem shut off and in pain. I see friends that were once very close to the Lord who have fallen away also. Part of this new quest is to reach out to them. I strive to show them love, kindness and caring. May that be the light that leads them to back to Jesus.

Obsessions

Back in high school we were assigned to read Melville's epic story Moby Dick in English class. It turns out that I never had time to do so. I was too busy combing my hair or whatever I used to do back then. But thanks to an episode of the equally classic 90's Saturday morning cartoon, Bettlejuice, entitled Moby Richard, I was able to pass the test over the story. No problem!

Later in life, now that I have developed a slower pace and a deeper appreciation for stories without spaceships and laser guns, I have enjoyed going back and rereading those stories that I blew through in a hurry... and finally visit those I never even touched at all. It has been quite the learning experience.

"All that most maddens and torments; all that stirs up the lees of things; all truth with malice in it; all that cracks the sinews and cakes the brain; all the subtle demonisms of life and thought; all evil, to crazy Ahab, were visibly personified, and made practically assailable in Moby Dick. He piled upon the whale’s white hump the sum of all the general rage and hate felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his chest had been a mortar, he burst his hot heart’s shell upon it."
- Moby Dick, Herman Melville

And so our hearts do become cold and wicked. We pick an obsession and we chase it to the end. We go down with the ship, blind and oblivious to the ramifications of our madness. Often times in life I have pressed the accelerator to the floor in my own name. I have let curses spill from my lips and have have cared not for what I ran asunder on my quest.

That is not God. Christ wants us to be poured out as a sacrifice... not to plummet to a self-centered doom. It is the tale of man from Adam on down. We see it in David and his affair with Bathsheba. We see it over and over. When do we stop the hunt? When do we yield? When do we let our made-up white whales slip beneath the sea and allow vengeance to escape through our fingers like sand?

When do we trust in Him?

Through the Fog

I was driving into work this morning. I rounded a bend and I drove into a bank of fog. It was so thick, like a soup. I was lost in gray, hazy nothingness. It was terrifying. I lost all my bearings.

I caught my breath, looked around, and the only thing I could find in all the fog was the sun. It tore through the thickness with a burning orange light. There was the sun... and then there was the wall of this world that I was lost in. I focused, relaxed and drove through the mist safely back down the roadway to work.

Now, on the other side of the wall of fog, I am left thinking about the larger metaphor and where I am now in my life... and my walk... if you can really call it a walk at all... with my Savior. I am left searching through this fog... and the only thing that matters is the SON.

--- Not my cool new shoes.
--- Not my brand new cellphone.
--- Not my shirt from the buckle.
--- Not my weight loss or how much bigger my arms are...

Those things haven't brought me out of my fog. They only have left me searching. I need the sun... I need the SON burning orange hot through my fog.

So... I do not walk back tonight. I RUN BACK. I am the prodigal. I see Him and I will beg to but be as a servant feeding the swine. Tonight I run back through the fog.

I'm coming back to the heart of worship and its all about you... all about you Jesus!