My Easter Prayer

I am blessed with youthfulness. Both in looks and attitude. Most people guess that I'm at least six years younger than I really am. I love this. Age seems to be an anchor pulling me out of a person that I am into a person that I don't want to be.

But as I find myself trapped in a sea of chaos I really have to examine this obsession with youth. Perhaps all of the real problems in my life come from the fact that I act half of my age. Perhaps all I'd really have to do is wake up one morning, raise my hands to the sides of my mouth and shout out to the world...

"I'm 32 years old!"

And everything would level out... Perhaps I could right the ship and put things back together again. But that is so hard to do. Its so hard to swallow deep and grow up. Its so hard that I stand right there at the brink, the solution right in my hands, and I delay. I delay. I ever chase youth. I ever look in the mirror and see that younger person.

My easter prayer was for me to become as good a husband as I am a youth leader... Its going to take a lot of grace to pull this one off. In your mercy, Lord, hear my prayer.

May G-squared

May Generation Genesis is coming at last! Next Sunday, May 7th at 7:00 in EHLC basement... emergent praise/postmodern worship. Thrown will be in the house! We have taken some time off for the ordeal that is prom to pass me by. I feel something building... I hope to let it out at G2. It might be mighty and loud. It might be quiet and tear-soaked. But I feel it coming.

Buckle your seat belts and prepare to experience Christ in a way you never have before. Bring a friend and prepare to worship OUR Savior, OUR WAY!

Generation Genesis
First Sunday of Each Month
EHLC Basement
7:00 PM until we are forced to leave!

Even When

I am back on the horse. I put on a Jeremy Camp CD... Restored. I just listened... both to the music and for the voice of the Lord. What happened? I heard His voice calling to me. I felt His Spirit washing over me. Everything is going to work out. No matter the outcome, I am part of His family. He wants to comfort me. He wants to restore me... and He will stick by me no matter the road. Now that road isn't guaranteed to be smooth. Its certainly not guaranteed to be easy... But I am guaranteed to have a partner to hold onto every step of the way.

Even when I stumble, even when I waste my inheritance, even when I throw a fit at the way things are and take my ball and go home... even when I close His Book, stop praying for a week, mope around listening to old U2 CDs... and feel sorry for myself... even after that... He's right there ready to pick me up and return me to his fold.

He is the best friend I have ever had. He is the only one that waits and waits and loves and loves... Even when I am weak, He is more patient than me. Even when I am a fool, He is smarter than me. Even when I doubt, He stands steadfast. He is my best friend.

Even When
Jeremy camp

you know and you see

the times of my defeat

when i fail to realize

your kindness reaches

through all my fragile fears

of wasting any years

and i see you go beyond

my silent feelings

even when i wrote my life away

you still receive me

even when i wrote my life away

you still receive me

Repost: Love

Or originally posted 2/21/2006.

If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

1 Corinthians 13:3

What is real love? Many people think it has something to do with reward. They ask, “What do I get from this relationship.... Why am I putting so much effort into it? What is the return?” That is how the world sees love. But it isn’t the love that Paul spoke of in the bible.

But it is possible, now I know, to love something-- someone even-- in a selfless way. You can love them for what they are going to give forward to the world. You can invest time and effort into your relationship because of the promise of a different kind of return. Some day, some where you will see a big list of things that your investment reaped and you can smile and say, “WOW, I helped put that light into the world....” and that is what it is all about.

Other people don't get that. In fact, they hate it. They attack real love and try to stamp it out, twist it, destroy it, mock it or snuff it from the world. They want love to be about selfish reward; be it sex or monetary or greed or possession or obsession. But that isn't love. That is control.

There is love without control, free and perfect love. Love that exists while opening the cage and letting the bird fly free. Love that my grandfather showed me in his basement. Love for a people you are ready to die for. Jesus loved me. I have found things that I truly love. I am ready to suffer for that which I love.

Lord, be with me as I carry this cross. AMEN

Martha and Mary

At the Home of Martha and Mary As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!"

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Luke 10:38-42

We all need the support of our friends. Jesus had good friends. Let's take a look at two of them.

Martha got things done. We need people like that! She offered Jesus her house. She cooked, prepared a place to stay, got all the hard details done. But Jesus had been on the road for a long time. He had been ministering to the masses, laying hands on the sick, healing the crippled, giving the blind sight, casting out demons. What did Jesus need? What kind of helper did he really NEED?

Mary didn't look to Jesus' physical needs but to his emotional needs. Mary sat with Jesus, close, down at His feet and listened to Him. She showed Him a different kind of love. She was supportive of His mission. She showed that she was on His side, and that she longed to know every detail of who He was and where He had been and where He was going.

Sometimes we just need Mary at our side. Sometimes our physical needs are SO secondary to our emotional and spiritual needs, that even though we have been lost in the desert for ages, we would forgo a drink of water for a moment in a caring person's arms, to see a smiling face, to know that you aren't alone on the road... that someone else is sharing this walk with you.

Thank God for placing Marys in our lives. We couldn't make it without them.

Fumbling in the Dark

Shadows Prove the Sunshine

Switchfoot

Sunshine, won't you be my mother
Sunshine, come and help me sing
My heart is darker than these oceans
My heart is frozen underneath

We are crooked souls trying to stay up straight,
Dry eyes in the pouring rain well
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine


I teach photography. Sometimes when we are in the darkroom you can get disoriented and fumble for the way out. There is a eerie fear in total darkness. When lost in the dark, you scan the black for light. It doesn't have to be much.... the smallest ray can be like a beacon to draw you towards the exit.


Shine on me,
Let my shadows prove the sunshine

When we are down and lost in shadows, its easy to think that we are going to be eaten by the blackness. But as Switchfoot reminds us, shadows are created by the coming light. Shadows prove that the sunshine is coming. Jesus is coming. The Master is coming our way. He's reaching out into the dark to pull us out of the shadows and into a warm, bright world.

Embrace that healing light today. Shine on me... erase my shadows with your sunshine.

Your word is a lamp to my feet

and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105

No change

I want to hold onto everything
I want to melt into this moment
and just stay with all my pieces intact
I want to collect, like memories in a scrapbook
And cling to the album of remembrance as I tumble into time
I don’t want this time to end
I don’t want this moment to fade
into all the other memories of my life

But the more I try to hold onto something,
The more I cling,
The more I squeeze,
The more it wiggles away
Like sand drippling through the hour glass I watch
My breath is frozen
My heart pounds
My ears filled with a thick drone
As the granules slip away
Will I be left with nothing?

Hold me, sweet Jesus, as time erodes
Call to me, sweet Savior, as everything changes
Nurse me, sweet Shepherd, as I battle these demons
Give me a light, give me a path, give me a way
See me through this hour
See me through this dark shadowy valley
See me through to the light of day
See me back to your grace and your glory
Pick me up on your shoulders and carry me home

I am nothing without you!

A Trusty Saying

I always quote songs. When a youth has a problem, I look to the words of the Bible but then I will find a song that they can hang onto. Music is like medicine. Yesterday I listened to In God's Country literally close to 50 times. I hung on the words... but most of all I was blown away by the Edge's guitar solo... the haunting, piercing chime-like sound coming in over the rumbling bass and low tom pounding. That sound was what my soul felt like. It was the same echo, the same pain, the same cry.

Paul quotes songs in his letters to his buddy Tim. A pastor that he had raised from a young man to see him installed as a great leader in the early church, Timothy was more than a friend to Paul, he was more than a son, more than just another Christian that Paul loved in the brotherly way. Tim was Paul's partner in ministry. In the early days, Tim was there giving Paul support, even when things weren't going well. Then as Tim grew as a church leader, Paul was there to give guidance and lift him up. Now, as Paul suffers in the purgatory of a Roman jail, he writes to his dear, dear companion and tells him to keep on working for Jesus... and to remember to pay him a visit before he dies.

He quotes this dear friend a song, perhaps one that they had sung together in a better time. He says, Remember these words... they are good for your soul...



Here is a trustworthy saying:

If we died with him,
we will also live with him;

if we endure,
we will also reign with him.

If we disown him,
he will also disown us;

if we are faithless,
he will remain faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.

2 tim 2:11-13

Enter into relationship with Jesus Christ through his death on the cross and you enter into a new life. Everything shifts and you become a child of God. You are His and He is yours.

If we turn our lives into a work of art for Him... it is then that we live in HIM. We become heirs to the Kingdom. Our walk with Christ will continue in heaven. Oh, the day I see Him in heaven and I bow down at His feet and weep my tears of joy for they will be wiped away by His very hand. Praise GOD! The day is coming.

But oh, friends... Stay close to Him. Do not reject Him. Do not run from your promises. Do not give up your link to the Lord... for if you are not linked to Him you are linked to sin... and sin is the devil's only real power over you. Do not deny Him or on that day of Judgment you will stand before God alone... Jesus no where in sight. And you will have to make an account of each of your own sins... And friends, there is not a list long enough to scribe all that I have done wrong. I either have Jesus as my attorney... or I face eternal damnation for my pitiful failures.

But alas, Paul's lyrical quote gives us hope. We don't have to carry the burden. We don't have to be perfect. We don't have to be doubtless. We don't have to stand alone. For when we are WEAK... HE IS STRONG! And oh, friends, I am often weak. But Jesus will carry me over the finish line.

Jesus loves me! This I know
For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to Him belong
They are weak, but He is strong

Yes Jesus Loves Me... The Bible tells me so

Sorry

Sorry loyal blog readers. I haven't made a meaningful post in a while. Prom really wiped me out then yesterday I got REALLY ILL. I am at work today but don't feel very steady.

I am also struggling with doubt and depression today. I feel like the sky is falling. Pray! Pray! Pray! I need peace and clarity. I need to hear His voice clearly. I need to know that He's going to follow me... even when I fade.

In God’s Country
U2

Set me alight, we'll punch a hole right through the night

Every day the dreamers die to see what's on the other side

She is liberty, and she comes to rescue me

Hope, faith, her vanity

The greatest gift is gold

Sleep comes like a drug in God's country

Sad eyes, crooked crosses, in God's country

Naked flame, she stands with a naked flame

I stand with the sons of Cain

Burned by the fire of love

Burned by the fire of love.

Sleep comes like a drug in God's country

Sad eyes, crooked crosses, in God's country

Prom is over! Early morning antidote

I ever chase youth...

The Big Dance

This is the last big push for prom. The big event is tomorrow afternoon, evening and early morning. I have seen things go from chaos and insurrection to beautiful masterpiece. I have pulled through this event with the help of a few very strong friends that have really picked me up and carried me through this. I owe them so much.

When you look at the works of art that stand on our stage for grand march it makes every insult and attack milt away. My vision is realized and its amazing. But as I stand before the draw bridge that the girls will walk out I wonder... "What does prom celebrate?" As I gaze upon the ice castle where the boys will emerge in their tuxedos, I pause and think... "What are we doing here with this grand regalia? What are we worshiping?"

Prom is a celebration of youth and beauty. It stands as a time where kids take a break from their busy schedules and dress up and have fun. It’s a party... a day away. Is that ok? Sure! Why not. I love to see my kids, especially the girls who normally wear jeans and t-shirts in their fancy gowns, their hair and nails done professionally. For many its the only day they will were makeup that year. But what about the commitment?

I spend countless hours this month toiling over every detail. From every decoration to meal details, to seating charts and dj details and contracts and table clothes. I am not near the art teacher in the spring that I am in the fall. Is that ok? I don't know. I sure put on beautiful proms. If that is your priority than I guess that its fine. But what about the financial cost?

Our school... just the junior class, spends about $3,000 dollars on prom. That doesn't even begin to figure in what the parents bring in for donations and spend on door prizes, casino night merchandise and food. Then there is what the optimists spend on the early morning breakfast and grand door prize. That is quite the total I am sure. But that doesn't begin to figure in the expense that each youth (or more accurately often the parents) spend on prom. They get nails done, get hair fixed up, wax their brows, buy dresses, rent tuxes, fix up cars... some may even rent a limo. They buy flowers and jewelry and makeup and on and on. This all adds up to equal the total amount that we apply as the financial commitment of our community on prom... on a dance... on one night that glorifies beauty. Is that ok?

How many mouths would that feed? How many homeless would that shelter? How much medicine would that buy? How much good could we do with that money? That is the question. Where are our values? Where are our priorities? So as I head to prom in 24 hours I will have a heavy heart. I am the coach of the beauty show... I am the head of the big dance. Am I using my talents for the right endeavors?

Who's Your Daddy?

We all want to be on the winning team. We all want to think that we are good, right folk. But here is a reality check folks. John says it plain and clear in his first letter.

Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil's work. No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God's seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother.

1 john 3:7-10

So who's your daddy? Are you a child of God or are you a child of the devil? Do you follow Father-God or father-Satan? You can't have it both ways. Those who say, "My sins are covered... I can do whatever I want" take the cross of Jesus Christ for granted. It belittles His sacrifice and that is a foolish game.

Those who abide in Christ find new life. Those who hide in His shadow and use Him as an insurance policy or as a reason avoid responsibility or consequences aren't living to please Him. They aren't living to follow His will or to walk in His ways. It makes me wonder if they truly know him. They are living to please their fleshly desires and follow their own worldly fancy.

This doesn't mean that we Christ-followers become perfect, blameless people. The process of becoming into His imagine is a lifelong venture. We always fight temptations-- that root of the old nature lurks in us... but as we grow closer and closer to Christ, we yearn to ever please Him. We constantly look to Him for strength and guidance and He works in us with his saving grace. God is our good parent, leading us, nurturing us... sometimes telling us no. Through our daily walk with Him, He changes us with His AWESOME LOVE. He works on us until that faitful day that we become refined in the next Kingdom like pure gold.

So next time you have a choice to make, stop and think. Who is your daddy? Who is working in your heart? Will your actions be pleasing to Christ or the evil one.

Power Prayer

They asked me to let them pray for me... I didn't hesitate.
I heard the voice of a teenage male say, "YEAH! BEEN WANTING TO DO THAT!" I had goose bumps.

I nodded. I have been waiting... my soul has been waiting. I have been hungry. Too often I give. I am the prayer guy. They come to me. I place my hands upon them... I give. I want to receive.

They circled around. There were a bunch of them. Most of them teens. I could feel His breath. I asked, "How do you want me?" meaning where and how. In my little troupe we would do a "GROUP HUG". But I was on their turf.

A voice said, "We'll take you as you are..."

I said, "I may fall, so I might as well start on my knees." I got down. Hands on my shoulders. Hands on my back. One strong hand on my left shoulder... not physical... but I felt full when it heavily came upon me. Ryan stood before me and laid a hand upon me.

I looked to the youth that I had brought along for the service. She was hanging back a few feet from the circle. I said, "I want her in on this too." Meaning I wanted her to pray for me, knowing that God works through her in marvelous ways. But before I knew it, she was on her knees next to me with hands laid on her as well.

They prayed. First Ryan... words of encouragement. Words that build. I was blown away. Everyone then. First in English... then a few in tongues. Then the person behind me to my right... in a strong voice spoke and drowned out the others. I could still hear them... but time seemed to stop as I focus on hers. Suddenly, I wasn't being prayed for by this circle of believers. Suddenly I was filled with a light and I felt a powerful presence, like being at the feet of Jesus Himself. I bowed lower... as low as I could and just cried out to Jesus. I let the words flow. I have no idea what they were but they said everything I needed to say. I spoke not to this girl or this youth pastor or my own youth... I was speaking to Him.

The only thing I can come close to comparing it to is the feeling I have as I am taking the bread and wine. I feel that union... that connectivity.

Soon I was returning to the world of FAoG in Harlan. They were done praying except one voice. Perhaps it was Ryan's. They backed away. I still knelt. A trickle of words still leapt from my mouth so I foolishly covered it with my hand. I didn't want to move. I wanted to stay right there forever. I looked at my youth. She had this look on her face. She looked like Moses coming down off the mountain. We smiled at each other for a moment.

Finally I got up and wandered around in a daze. Perhaps this is being drunk on the Spirit? Whatever it is, we rode back to town in silence... just speechless.

We Are Hungry

Lord I want more of you
Holy Spirit rain down on me
Lord I need more of you
Living breath of life come fill me up

We are hungry
We are hungry
We are hungry for the more of You
We are thirsty, oh Jesus
We are thirsty for the more of You

We lift our holy hands up
We want to touch You
We lift our voices higher and higher and higher to You

We are hungry
We are hungry
We are hungry for the more of You
We are thirsty, oh Jesus
We are thirsty for the more of You

There will come a day when we will be in a BIG circle of believers. We will bow and we will commune with God in a way even more personal than what I felt tonight. On that day... ZAM! I will be complete. I will be fed to my fill. That hunger in my soul will finally disappear.

What are you listening to?

What I'm Fighting For
Matisyahu

What I'm fighting for
Is worth far more than silver and gold
What I'm fighting for
Is a chance to unite the past
With the brothers coming home at last
Fighting together for light

Sons & Daughters of Abraham
Lay down to a higher command
Don't be tricked by the axl man
God's wisdom revealed in a holy plan

A chance to unite the past
With the brothers coming home at last
Fighting together for light

To Zion we roam & we're not all alone
Unite and you will find
What I'm fighting for
Is worth far more than silver and go-gold
What I'm fighting for
Is a chance to unite the past
With the brothers coming home at last
Fighting together for light

To Zion we roam & we're not all alone
Unite & you will find
What I'm fighting for

I have been rocking the Matisyahu lately. I don't know if its worshipful being Jewish reggae... but I'm just happy to have something that sounds like Sublime and quotes Psalms! Rock on Jewish Dude!

Don't close your eyes

It’s easy to get down. It’s easy to loose hope. It’s easy to decide life is hopeless and there is nothing worth living for. But let’s look today at who is behind these thoughts and who has a better way.

Life is inherently unfair. Things happen to us that we do not deserve. Your parents might die in a car wreck when you are little. Your house may burn down and kill your brothers and sister. You may be born with a disease that leaves you crippled and different than everyone else. You may be fat. You may be ugly. Someone may hurt you and make you feel like you are broken. Everyone is promised that sin will wreck their lives. This is a reality of this world. It is a byproduct of the fall. If this was not so, God the Father wouldn’t have had to send his only begotten son to die for that brokenness.

But you still hurt and you still can’t seem to find a way out of your troubles? So you think about quick, easy outs. You think about death. You think about jumping off- taking matters into your own hands. Forget God’s plan… you are ready!!!

Let's look at two examples the New Testament gives us on this topic. Jesus GAVE his life, a sacrifice for others. He willingly placed others needs before his own safety. He allowed himself to do so that YOU might live.

Judas, on the other hand, he took his life. Wrecked by guilt of what sins were on his hands, he selfishly took control. He ended his life thinking only of his own sorry self.

This is not Christianity! Being a Christ-follower involves giving up control to the will of Father-God, just like Jesus did in the Garden on the Mount of Olives. If we fall into a sea of our own self-pity we fool ourselves... we give control over to the devil and we die. We live life in the reflection of Judas, a betrayer... and not Jesus our Savior.

Jesus taught us that life is precious and that death is the work of the 'thief'. John 8:44 says that Satan is a "murderer" and the "father of lies". The feelings of despair that lead to suicide are caused by some of his lies. Jesus teaches us to embrace the opposite. He wants us to have LIFE! New Life in HIM! He said, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)

So what is the answer to feelings of despair and hopelessness? Make no mistake; these feelings are a result of the cancer that eats spiritually at this world. This cancer is sin... the devil's tool. There is only one REAL remedy to the sins of the world... Faith in God and the promises made and fulfilled by Jesus on the cross.

We wait in hope for the LORD;
he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice,
for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD,
even as we put our hope in you.

Psalms 33:20-22

Jesus won't just take your cares if you ask him to, he's begging you to. He loves you and he's calling you. He's watching you suffer and he's pleading for you to cast off the yoke of sin that is weighing you down. He says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

Salvation isn't just securing eternal security. Salvation is placing trust in the Lord, giving everything to Him... mostly your TRUST! If we believe that Jesus is Lord and place our trust in Him and we walk with Him He becomes in us and we gain a new life in HIM! Our old sins are washed away. We become new creations in HIM! We break our old bonds of sin and become attached to HIM. If you are still a slave to your old sin... let it go and really trust in Jesus... don't just say a prayer... don't just go to the altar... ALTER YOUR LIFE! Jesus is there and He's ready to change you and take away your burdens and give you peace!

We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.

1 John 2:3-6

Transform your life into a reflection of Jesus Christ... never give up or give in to the pressures of the devil... Don't let your life become a reflection of Judas the betrayer. Find forgiveness. Find salvation in Christ. Find new life. Find a new beginning. Don't just go to Jesus... run to him and shout and weep and throw yourself down and give it all too Him.

This is your Life

Switchfoot

yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead

yesterday is a promise that you've broken

don't close your eyes,

don't close your eyes

this is your life and today is all you've got now

yeah, and today is all you'll ever have

don't close your eyes

don't close your eyes

this is your life, are you who you want to be

this is your life, are you who you want to be

Jake the Drake Update

Hey Brant! How's it going?!

You know I never thought I gave you guys the low down on how Spain went so I thought I'd send the message.

God did a lot of amazing things in Spain. We were split up again into three cities (Vic, Barcelona, and Gerona) and I was in Vic. We have been to Vic three years in a row now but have never seen as much fruit from the city as this year. Three people prayed to receive Christ and we meet a student at the local university who says that his friends all call him a Jesus Freak.

Last year one whole family came to faith in Christ but this is the first year we actually met another Christian who was on fire for God before we ever talked to him. He's already shared the gospel with his friends and so it was encouraging to both him and us to be able to hang out with him and his friends. The gospel was probably shared one-on-one with over 100 people in the week we were there and God did amazing things in some of the other cities as well. The whole week Malachi 1:5 was in my head as well.

You will see it with your own eyes and say,
"Great is the LORD -even beyond the borders of Israel!"

In other news, God has been doing some pretty neat things at Drake. We have a concert at my house next weekend that will be alcohol free and the talent that is performing is pretty much church bands from both our church and a sister church up in Minnesota. This weekend is a weekend that many people will go and get wasted and so we're hoping to be providing an alternative to the night for those who do not want to drink. Umm, God has led me to go on staff with the church, ahhh! An exciting but nervous thing since I will have to do support-raising for myself. And finally, I will be giving a poster presentation at the next science conference (the 27th) on Intelligent Design and how schools should handle it in the science classroom.

I know you had talked to me before about possibly taking the kids to Des Moines for Alive some night so I thought I'd also let you know that there's about 3 more weeks of the campus service left. It's again on Thursday nights at 8:30 PM. This week we have a national speaker, Tom Short (www.shortreport.com) coming to talk about The Davinci Code (you know all the lies and such it promotes). And there's no telling what's up for the next couple weeks after that. I hope all is going well in Elk Horn and continue to keep you in my prayers.

In Christ,
Jake Bennett

More on Jake

Almost Heaven

More West Virginia Memories

Tripple Post Saturday!

Can it be? Can I actually have three posts in a single day? COOL!

Here is an email from a former leaguer and good friend who endured the tornados two days ago in Iowa City, IA. Pray for those who have lost in these storms. Praise God for His awesome work also. God is at work in all things... Some times we have to look harder than others.

Hello,
As i'm sure you already heard on the news today, last night a series of tornadoes ripped through downtown IA city, and caused lots of damage to the downtown area.

Last night after the storm had passed and the all clear was sounded, some friends and i took a walk and looked at all the destruction. The worst of it was around Iowa Avenue, friend's houses were damaged (they're fine), traffic lights didn't work, trees and cars were tore up and flug everywhere, windows blown out, and the ENTIRE ped-mall had been roped off with caution tape by the police and national guard. (supposedly there were gas leaks).

The most amazing thing i saw last night had to have been near the hospital. We were walking near the hospital and we saw sitting there in the parking lot a devistated mini van, the side windows all broken up, and the doors dented. as we came closer to it for closer inspection, there was an elderly couple that came behind us and said "that was our van, we were on Jefferson Street when the tornado hit, and some lumber with nails flew through our windows, we got bloodied up a bit from the glass, but otherwise we're fine."

The husband of the couple opened the door on the driver's side, and held up three large pieces of wood with sevral protruding nails in it. "We're lucky to be alive," the wife said, "someone was really watching over us tonight."

It was really cool to see that little glimse of God's good work last night, you know? I mean he was watching over all of us, but it's still amazing that they survived, and God is really the only explination i can think of as to why they did.

I just thought you would find that interesting,

Angela

Everywhere I Go!

Yesterday I woke with a smile on my face. I just felt close to God... I walked down to the bakery and got a cup of coffee. I had my Jesus Journal and scribed some freeform poetry and worked on the half dozen terminally unfinished songs I always work on. When my coffee fix was satisfied I strolled up to the church and strummed my guitar. I rolled out the door at about ten o'clock and the sun was shinning and birds were churping.

Praise the LORD.
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;
his love endures forever.

Psalm 106:1

Spring has sprung! The cold frost of winter is long gone. Freedom from the cold bite of the frozen earth and new life popping out everywhere was so inspiring. I began to sing as I came down Main Street on foot. I sang a song by Jeremy Camp.

Right Here

All the world is watching
All the world does care
Even when the world weighs on my shoulder now,
These feelings I can bare
Because I know,
That you're here,

Everywhere I go,
I know you're not far away,
You're right here
You're right here, yeah

At first I whistled. Then I sang softly. Soon my joy was overflowing and a began to sing as loud as I could... People driving by and entering the downtown business looking at me wide eyed... especially since I don't know more than a few dozen of the words.

Praise God for the Spring.

Like Mike

When I think about special times, really special times in my life, I can quickly form a list in my mind’s eye. I see them laid out before me, like a collage made of fragments of photos spanning my years of existence. As I gaze at them I can see that there is a common thread that links together the mosaic of my life. Some stand out strong… formative… indelible in my mind. I remember my grandfather's woodshop in his basement. I remember how special and loved I felt there. I remember the way I felt when I watched Mr. Rogers. He said that he loved me no matter what, unconditional love. Other moments share this theme, each with this warm feeling of being surrounded in a warm nest of love. It is this shepherd-like quality that I so identify with.

Keep watch over yourselves and all the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers. Be shepherds of the church of God, which he bought with his own blood.

Acts 20:28

And that is what I long to share with my youth. On our mission trips there is this special moment on Thursday night where we have a foot washing ceremony. After a person's feet are washed, the leader offers to pray with the youth. These prayers of intersession can be short, rote blessings… or can be long power prayers where the two share back and forth what the Spirit lays on the participants’ hearts at that time. You can guess which one I go for. I have been a crazy prayer guy. YEAH!

There is this awesome feeling of closeness that I have only experienced in this sort of communion, two believers snuggled close in a hug, bound together by an outpouring of the spirit and words just coming… words that build… words that edify… words that make you who you are and who you want to be and transform you into the new person in Christ’s image that YOU HAD TO BE! I love prayer. And know that while I seem to have some sort of a gift for this sort of thing, I don’t take the credit for being good at prayer (Michael Casey states in Towards God that there is no such thing as good or bad prayer. Both bring you closer to God, which means it’s a success… see Romans chapter 8). But I do know that I am not afraid to let the Spirit work through me. Its all Him.

More of YOU… Less of me. –Jeremy Camp

But where did I pick this up? What happened that turned me from a hardened hearted fool who wasn’t into praying or crying or sharing my feelings into a crying, praying, hugging Jesus freak? To understand that you must know Mike. Mike was my pastor, my mentor, my shepherd, my councilor, my teacher…. And Mike is my friend. Mike is my inspiration. Mike has the kind of heart that I strive to have.

Mike isn’t with us anymore. But everyday I remember what he was. I remember the way he pulled you in real close, put his arm around you and asked, “How are you doing?” I remember that way he prayed with you… He would hug you tight, place his mouth by year ear and say, “Dear Jesus, thank you so much for this sweet child. He is the light of the world. Build him up daily with your life-changing GRACE. May he walk with you everyday of his life…”

When I draw someone in close to share a prayer of intersession, I am just doing what I witnessed Mike do so many times. He wasn’t there to perform a ritual… it was certainly no absolution of sin… Mike was always quick to point out that a much better pastor did that for us all two thousand years ago. He was there to build up that person with words, to bring a blessing of the Holy Spirit, to make that person feel so loved, so changed, so blessed, so at peace with who they are in the grand scheme of God’s perfection that they would leave walking on clouds. Prayer with Mike was like a mushroom on Super Mario Brothers. It built you up and prepared you for spiritual combat; be it missions work or daily struggles.

Everyday I strive to be the kind of shepherd Mike was to our little group. Lord may I find his heart to serve and his love for people. AMEN.

The Blood

Tonight was my favorite night of the year. Tonight is the night we celebrate the death of Jesus Christ. In my life I have a short list of definitive moments. I count my selection into TAG in the 3rd grade and meeting Judy Combs as one of them. I also rank meeting my wife high on the list.
Also on the list are having my kids, taking my first painting class with David Dunlap, and applying for a job in eastern Nebraska (my derogatory name for western Iowa).

But when it comes to the big picture, when it comes to eternity... I have a shorter list. Number one on that list was getting my arm twisted into coming to my first Easter Walk. To see my students preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ to me, a prodigal son... trying his best to flee from God... It was life changing. It started a process of defrosting my heart, a process that saved me, not just from any short-term consequence. It saved my SOUL. Saved from death. Saved from the wiles of the devil and saved from the bondage of sin (I'm working on that last one... some days are better than others).

Tonight was our Easter Walk. It was just like other years but even more glorious.
Pastor opened in prayer. I sang an offering song, It was Love, an original. Then Amanda read a great set up about the passion. I may try to post it later. She did such a great job. She has come so far since last year when she read some stuff for League. She is becoming a great leader, public speaker but most of all, her heart is becoming every day more a reflection of Jesus Christ.

After a Michael W. video, we sent the audience to the stations. They returned to find Jesus on the cross. When they take him down it is so heart breaking. The guards place him in the tomb and the stone is rolled across the entrance and boom it is shut. And my Jesus is dead... and my Jesus is in the tomb.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

Philippians 2:5-8

Calla did the closing prayer. It turned into a soul-searching event with each member writing a private confession on a slip of paper and placing it at the foot of the cross. I don't know when last I felt so convicted by the Holy Spirit in that building. I wrote my prayer... "Be a better husband. Be a better father. Keep my relationships right and pure. Give me strength to be the same person at church, at school and home and in the dark when no one is watching. Thank you for dying for me and thank you for not giving up on me. AMEN"

After everyone had laid their confessions at the cross, folks filed out. But Two girls, still dressed in their bible-era costumes, made their way up to the alter and sat down cross-legged and held each other and wept, prayed, comforted and shared private stories. Mostly they wept.

I was really worried. Twenty minutes went by. I was taking down the cross and they still sat there on the floor and shed tears. So I asked Amanda what was wrong. Could I help her? How can I fix whatever got her so upset. She answered in words I won’t soon forget.

She said, "It hurts to know why He is up there. And not just why He's up there... but everything I do is right there with Him. And WOW! It gets me."

Speechless, again I see the glory of God revealed upside-down. The poor made rich. The weak made strong. The teenager made wiser than her youth leader. She just didn't cry during the video. She just didn't cry during the prayer or the confession. Her heart was touched. She was changed. It will take her a long stretch of time to process the extent that God loves her... And I am humbled.

God, work through our group. Work through our Easter Walks. Work through our kids. May they ever point to you and your sacrifice. AMEN.